A manager’s brief guide to trust
Trust is an essential quality in most relationships. We trust our dentists not to cause more harm to our teeth; we trust our partners to support us in hard times; we trust our work managers to develop us professionally. It’s difficult because trust puts us in a vulnerable position – we concede some power to someone or something else – and in turn we request tenderness, respect, and honesty. The degree to which we can expect those qualities is dependent on our level of trust.
Trust is the result of a neurochemical release called oxytocin. The more oxytocin, the more trust you feel in that situation or toward a specific person/thing. In professional settings, trust is proven to improve the lives and productivity of employees across major metrics: more energy, greater productivity, improved satisfaction, fewer sick days, and less burnout (among others).
For folks in management positions, it’s especially beneficial to spend time instilling trust with your direct reports, and it can be done pretty simply. I pulled out three (of eight) ways you can build trust whether you’re managing a team of 1 or 100.
Recognize excellence. This is easy to take for granted, but a highly potent way of building trust, instilling confidence, and providing feedback. Communication is key, especially in regard to performance. If your direct report is in the dark on their performance, if they don’t really know where they stand, these employees will become more guarded, more inclined to doubt themselves, and less willing to be proactive and take healthy risks.
Intentionally build relationships. This takes very little time and is so meaningful to colleagues, especially those that skew higher toward a highly-social communication preference. Spending 3-5 minutes really talking about the weekend, remembering to follow up on that cool thing they were going to, or checking in on the wellness of their pet can be a game-changer for a trusting relationship.
Provide autonomy. This is a simple way of showing respect to your colleagues as individuals and their ability to do good work. After ensuring they have the tools to succeed, allow them to solve problems the way that makes sense to them. You may rely heavily on visuals; they might prefer to solve things by ear. Giving them the opportunity to choose builds confidence and learning, as well as helps stoke the state of flow we desire at work.
The presence of trust is paramount to effective coaching. It’s baked into most contracts between coach and client, including 100% confidentiality (unless legally required to provide, or depending on an arrangement with multiple parties). This is to ensure the relationship is built on a foundation of trust.
I tend to see the most potent versions of trust within the context of the relationship. Why is it so important? Honesty is often found when we’re at our most vulnerable. While it’s not always necessary for me to see that vulnerability, my clients often need to access that place to maximize their growth and development. Coaching is only as impactful as my clients are willing to be honest and vulnerable. Trust is more difficult for some, especially given the varying experiences each of us has had – I respect this with everyone. Fortunately, coaching can meet you where you’re at. What you put in you tend to get out.
If you’re considering starting coaching – either for your personal or professional development – I hope this is helpful to know. I establish trust by not judging, by providing plenty of space for processing, by holding you accountable to your values and commitments, by helping guide you to the truth, even when it’s scary and uncomfortable. There are times when you’ll trust me to show you something uncomfortable. And it goes both ways, I trust you to be able to handle the truth. If you want to learn more about coaching and get a general vibe of me, please schedule a 1:1 consultation here or keep learning about coaching on my site.
Go get ‘em this week.